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To Feed – The Core Quality Of A Mother

10th March 2013 By Urvashi Roe Leave a Comment

There is one core quality which I associate with being a mother.

Feeding.

Aside from cuddling, it’s the very first thing we mothers do. It’s instinctive. It’s primal. It’s raw.

It starts with milk

Milk is a non botanical which I am completely in awe about. On my very first day of being a mother, it riddled me with so many emotions. It wouldn’t come so I was distraught and demoralised. The one thing I had to do for my daughter and I couldn’t do it. How would I cope with everything else? Contraptions and massages followed with feelings of humiliation. I slept. I relaxed. It came. I cried with the pain but smiled at the calm it brought to Amber. I felt satisfied. There was nothing else this newborn child needed right then except for me. I delighted and dozed in this selfishness.

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Purées and mash

Weaning came too quickly. How much complexity baby rice brought. How much waste practising the right consistency. Thankfully, the excitement wore off quickly with my girls and I was grateful. Indeed I was proud they wanted to move to more challenging tastes. It started with apples and pears and progressed to carrots, broccoli, cauliflower, sweet potato, peas, parsnips. Nothing acidic. Nothing complex in structure.

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Herbs and spices

The part I had been waiting for. A little hint of garlic. A tiny pinch of cumin. Turmeric as standard went into everything – just a sprinkling. Basil, parsley, coriander, mint. The leaves of all our herbs were fascinating to fingers eager to work. The textures were intriguing. Hard. Soft. Crunchy. Cold. Warm.

This was a time when cooking started. The self satisfaction returned with gusto each time my girls asked for more. little portions. Big smiles. A warm glow inside me.

Learning their tastes….

The warm glow inside was as bountiful with Amy as it was with Amber. She liked different tastes. She explored the food her sister had moved on to. It was all a complex project which kept growing and developing. Flavours and matching them to a balance – Sweet. Salty. Sour. Bitter. Hot.

…and stretching their imaginations

Of course feeding was not and continues never to be about giving the girls the food they like. I want them to see and smell and most of all explore food. Where does it come from? How does it grow? How do we cook it? Why is it good for us? This is the part I am in love with. Head over heels and utterly lovestruck by.

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I am lucky. They are great eaters. They are enthusiastic about everything we eat and keen to learn to cook it. And that’s the next adventure now beginning. Like many mothers cooking together starts with cake. Well why not? Because it is after all, also the role of a mother to spoil. To coddle. To love.

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Happy Mother’s Day!

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Filed Under: Random Thoughts Tagged With: Mothers Day

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Kavey says

    10th March 2013 at 11:05 am

    How lovely! As a non-parent, but with many friends who are parents, I’m genuinely amazed and delighted when I witness how genuinely open-minded Amber and Amy are to all kinds of food – how excited they are to try everything, how grown up they are in deciding whether or not they like something, and how much they know about food and where it comes from. It’s a pleasure to see, it truly is.
    I wish I could point a few other parents I know in your direction and say, “look… this… this is a wonderfully healthy and happy approach to teaching kids about food, this is how it should be…”
    But of course, I wouldn’t dream of it, because it’s a sensitive issue for most parents, and a non-parent is not really permitted by society to comment.
    Anyway, I am commenting, and am full of admiration.
    Happy Mother’s Day, Urvaishi!

    Reply
    • Urvashi Roe says

      10th March 2013 at 2:08 pm

      Thank you for your kind words lovely. Just felt the need to write that this morning as I get all emotional thinking about their little lives.

      Reply
  2. @Lavender and Lovage (@KarenBurnsBooth) says

    10th March 2013 at 12:43 pm

    A wonderfully poignant article Urvashi and beautiful photos too…….I love black and white photos, and often use that setting on my camera when photographing friends and family!

    Reply
    • Urvashi Roe says

      10th March 2013 at 2:10 pm

      Thanks Karen. Difficult to do good monochrome with food photography but works so well with faces and somehow makes the memories stronger

      Reply
  3. Sandy Calico says

    10th March 2013 at 2:06 pm

    I love this post, Urvashi. Happy Mother’s Day.

    Reply
    • Urvashi Roe says

      10th March 2013 at 2:10 pm

      Thanks Sandy. Hope your boys have been cuddling you lots today xx

      Reply
  4. Kat Egan says

    10th March 2013 at 8:39 pm

    Beautiful, Urvashi! I can totally relate to this:) Thanks!! Happy Mommy’s Day!

    Reply
    • Urvashi Roe says

      10th March 2013 at 9:13 pm

      Thank you 🙂

      Reply
  5. tracy says

    11th March 2013 at 1:40 pm

    beautiful! my mother did not cook with many spices. It took years for me to develop the taste for foreign foods, but oh how I love them now. Your daughters are so lucky to have your inspired dishes.

    Reply
    • Urvashi Roe says

      11th March 2013 at 7:21 pm

      Thanks Tracy. I just want them to not be afraid to try different things like I was when I was little.

      Reply
  6. andreamynard says

    11th March 2013 at 8:31 pm

    Gorgeous post, Urvashi. I love the photos and your words, beautiful. So brilliant that you’re all enjoying exploring food together so much.

    Reply
    • Urvashi Roe says

      11th March 2013 at 10:07 pm

      Thank you Andrea. I do offer them a McDonalds every now and then – just to sense check I’m not overloading on the good stuff – and am so so relieved when they say no thanks!

      Reply
  7. sloegandt says

    11th March 2013 at 9:51 pm

    The baby rice phase was curtailed swiftly in this household, too! I think it’s too easy to underestimate our little ones’ desire to taste and learn and am frequently humbled by my twos’ capacity to accept and try anything. Happy belated Mother’s Day!

    Reply
    • Urvashi Roe says

      11th March 2013 at 10:08 pm

      Thank you. I think it’s all positioning. Marketing I guess. Positioning food well and in an interesting way wins every time

      Reply
  8. kellie@foodtoglow says

    14th March 2013 at 5:20 pm

    I loved reading this. The beautiful images, and the punchy style of it. Your words brought back lovely memories of my own experiences. I had a very tough time with breastfeeding as my daughter was an emergency section and almost 2 months early. Once we got to weaning that’s when the pleasure of providing really kicked in. I did as you did – the vegetables, the spices, the herbs, the full palate with the exception of salty. She is a terrific eater now and I blame myself! Lol. Really a lovely piece, Urvashi. Thanks for sharing your experience and wisdom.

    Reply
    • Urvashi Roe says

      15th March 2013 at 8:35 am

      Thanks Kelly. I do agree on the salty. Still don’t use salt in their food but allow the occasional salty popcorn x

      Reply

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Hi I'm Urvashi!

I love food. This blog is a little glimpse into my foodie world which is an escape from two teenage girls, a busy job and my little cafe.

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